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Facing my fears, I made an appointment with my school'scounseling center.Therapy was slow going at first, and looking back at it I am amazed at howmuch fear I had. After a year of therapy, I had become to accept myself asa transsexual much more easily. I was left with a great decision, totransition or not to transition? That was the question. I had so manyfears then - I feared that my friends would treat me as freakish. I wasscared of employment discrimination, I even feared that the HRT would makeme act erratically. Transitioning transsexuals must follow a set of medical and legalprotocols known as the Benjamin Standards of Care. Named after Dr. HarryBenjamin, they are a source of consternation and comfort for transsexuals.To be brief, they require a transsexual to have at least three months ofpsychotherapy before starting hormone replacement therapy - knowncolloquially as HRT.Typically, HRT is done with an endocrinologist. Endocrinology is among thenewest sciences. After sex. I had to arrange this part of it and I had no idea how my friend Ron would feel about me having a black cock in me. As it turned out I didn’t have a thing to worry about. As always the anticipation of something like this was always a little exciting for me then, when it happened, it was one big thrill.I made most of the arrangements and we planned a long weekend; it would be four or five days. We were (Ron and I) planning on going to an area that we frequented when we really wanted to be alone. It was at least a 6 hour hike, miles away from anything. There was a nice flat area beside a creek where we could swim and Ron could fish. It was in a deep valley where you had to walk in or take a canoe up or down the creek…very isolated. We packed enough food for at least 5 days; I knew that my clothing would be minimal but I took a big jar of Crisco. As usual (with me and Ron) I would do almost all of the cooking and cleaning-up, they would handle everything else…everything…We hiked in to.
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